Don’t you love to hear how well your child behaves at school? Or for the babysitter? Basically, for anyone other than their own parents?? While parents are generally happy to get a good report on behavior from other caregivers, this phenomena can be very frustrating as well. Moms and dads often receive the brunt of a young child’s tantrums, defiance, anger, and tears. And this can leave you questioning why or wondering what you are doing wrong at home. I’m currently struggling with the toddler who stays in bed at naptime for everyone else except with me! First, be assured that you are not alone. The phenomena of children behaving better in settings outside of the home is extremely common. Children feel safe expressing their true feelings with their parents. Pushing against boundaries is safe when you know what to expect and you know that your parent will never leave you. I wonder if this change in behavior by setting isn’t also true of grown-ups as well. Have you ever been angry about something else but taken out that frustration on a spouse or family member? In the safe confines of our own family, we can express our truest feelings, even those emotions that might be a bit ugly. While in public situations, it is normal to maintain a different sense of decorum. Parents may naturally wish for that “angelic child” to show up at home as well. The good news that is your young child is learning about appropriate behavior in public settings. And that you have created a haven of security at home where that same child can express all of their anger and frustration. Remember that many parents have this same experience with their child’s changing behavior. I hope you get to have some angelic moments as well during the summer holidays.